Monday, 5 July 2010

The Anniversary

Here is a picture of my parents at their wedding social. Today would have marked their 35th wedding anniversary. I have been slightly dreading this day and I wasn't really sure how hard it would be on my Dad. I asked him a few days ago what he was going to do and he said he was going to go to his 'Dearest's' graveside.

After all the lead up of anticipation, I completely forgot about it. I blame it on the fact that I haven't looked at a calendar in a while but I feel terrible that I didn't call my Dad sooner. I called around 9:30 pm. and Nathan said he was sleeping on the couch. He had made his special fried chicken (my Mom's favourite) and Nathan had bought a cake for the two of them (without even knowing it was their anniversary...I assume my Dad didn't want to make it a big deal). But it is, and I hope his day was ok. I still feel terrible and I can't help but think that if my Mom was alive and he was sleeping on the couch on their anniversary it wouldn't have been such a big deal. Now, it's different.

I have attached a link of the post that my Mom had written about her wedding day. I hope you are all doing wonderful.

Much love and thanks,



Gloria said...

You can see the love in their eyes. Young love that matured into an everlasting love. Thank you for sharing this. Although Renee may not be here, she is in spirit and I will say, Happy 35th wedding anniversary Renee and Wahid. You truly are the best.
Hope you are doing okay Angelique. I think of you often and your family. Take care. God Bless You.

TheBlakkDuchess said...

Angelique, do not feel bad. You're dad obviously didn't want to make it a big thing. If I were in his shoes, I'd have wanted the day to myself as well. I know he will be happy to know that you called.

Happy Anniversary to two wonderful people, who raised some great kids, who turned into great adults.

Snowbrush said...

What a wonderful photo. Thank you for sharing it.

Your father is lucky to have you.

PurestGreen said...

I remember years ago when my aunt died and the look on my uncle's face. Just utterly lost, almost vacant. It will take time - plenty of time. Much love to you and your family.

Marie S said...

Happy Anniversary Renee and Wahid.
Love and hugs to both of you!!
Thank you so much Angelique. I needed to think about your beautiful mother today.
Blessings all over your whole family.

Jos said...

These celebration days can be very hard Angelique. Sometimes we feel the need to mark the occasion, and other times we prefer to let the day unfold in it's own pace. Sometimes we hold more of it in our hearts rather than in an outward way I suppose.

As always I am so pleased to see Renees blog come up in my reader. And reading back I can only smile as I hear her voice in the words written. And I see the depth of a love undiminished over time.

I hope you are keeping well. Know that you are all still very much in my thoughts and prayers. xx Jos

Elizabeth said...

I have read both of Renee's posts and yours, too. I am moved by all three, particularly that photo of your mother and father. I've stared at it and stared at it, seeing their youth and innocence. I have no words for any of this, other than gratitude that you would share it with us. Renee is reaching me even from so far away in such a way that you can't imagine. Thank you.

~Carrie from Cottage Cozy~ said...

Thank you so much for posting this. I think about your mom so often and miss visiting with her here on her blog!

Blessings & love to you all. Please give my regards to your dad especially at this most precious time.


Mim said...

those are great stories - I forgot about the double wedding - how funny!!

I hope your dear Dad is doing OK, what a love he is.

Robyn said...

Your beautiful Mum comes to mind often.
She was easy to love as you well know.

I think of her when I'm out and about applying my knitting on the streets (graffiti knitting) as she was very encouraging of me to do so... after I had expressed interest in it.

I'm sure your Dad is understanding of you being late to call him and would easily forgive you if you forgot at all.
He knows you love him.

take care and thank you for all that you share here.

love to you
x Robyn

Woman in a Window said...

I laughed with an open heart when I saw their picture. Your mom, so cute, and your dad, all protective in the shoulder. Love and devotion, that is what your mom and dad have been about.

much love to you and yours.


yoborobo said...

Angelique - thank you for sharing that lovely photo of your parents. I have been thinking of Renee a lot lately, and wondering how you are doing. Sweet girl, you shouldn't feel terrible, after all, you called your Dad. Nathan was there, and memories have been shared, I am sure. You are a young mom, and I remember those days very well. Sometimes I thought my brain was disintegrating! I couldn't remember where my keys were (ever!), or my own name half the time. Please tell your Dad I am thinking of him. I am going to go read Renee's post, which will be very much like having a visit with her. Love to you! xoxox Pam

Debra She Who Seeks said...

How young, young, young they look in the photo! 35 years! Another hard day for your Dad. I'm sure your Mom was with him in spirit all day.

Annie said...

I cried when I saw this beautiful photo of your parents, the light and love in their faces is so alive and I know it is still.
Don't feel badly about forgetting, everything happens for a reason and I know, no matter what it had to be a hard day for your dad. Perhaps low key was best.
Love and hugs to you dear girl.

Robin said...

Dear Angelique, it is lovely to hear your voice again....even on such a poignant day as today.

As I was a newcomer to Renee's blog last year, I had never read these two wonderful "Anniversary" posts..... I thought they were going to make my cry.... and they did...BUT....they made me laugh too. They made me aware of how much I miss your vibrant Mum, her passionate prose and her wicked wit!

Thinking of Wahid sleeping on the couch, is so sad. We can only imagine the memories, the sadness that he will think of today. To have such a jewel as Renee for thirty five years is not enough.
How I wish we could all do something more than send love, prayers and a few months, "Renee's Book of Love" will be closer to finding a publisher....and we can send you all something tangible to hold, to read, to cry and laugh with.

KJ and I were just talking the other night about how much we MISS being able to chat with Renee via e-mail. I have had a rough year emotionally, and there have been countless times when I wanted to reach out and just tell her. (Of course, I KNOW she KNOWS....but, I miss her encouraging "voice" as she responded.)

So, I KNOW how much greater your loss is.... you had the real Renee to hold and kiss and hear her voice...

Please tell Wahid that he remains in all of out hearts and prayers, as do you, Camille, Jacqui and all the children.

We thank you for continuing to share Renee with us.

Love to you all, always,

♥ Robin ♥

Deborah said...

Beautiful. All of it, beautiful. All my love to you and the family, Deb

karen gerstenberger said...

Dear Angelique,
Thank you for the wonderful photo of your beautiful parents - how attractive they both are! And thank you for re-posting your mother's anniversary posts. She was very wise indeed, as you know. Her insights could be read in pre-marriage classes and help a lot of people as they are starting out in life.
May your father have all of the strength and love he needs as he walks through these days without your beautiful mother's physical presence. May all of her family receive that gift, especially you.

Julie said...

Wow Angelique, thanks for posting this picture! They both look so gorgeous, no wonder they fell in love with each other.

Dawn said...

What a beautiful couple they made, I think of you and your family and especially your mum often.... don't be hard on yourself, big hugs xxx

Marion said...

Oh, Angelique, I get so excited when I see a blog post here. I miss Renee so much. I talk to her picture in my office. :-)

I love this photo of your parents. They look so young, happy and full of life. Thank you for taking the time out of your life to share here. I know your Mom is very proud of you. Love & Blessings!!

studio lolo said...

Dear Angelique,

I love that you're keeping this connection open for us who still miss Renee.
My heart aches for all of you each day, and for your dad especially on this date. How sweet that he made fried chicken, and how amazing that Nathan bought a cake without knowing. I think your mum nudged him ;)

All of these days and remembrances are a first. The first anniversary without her, the children's birthdays, and soon Thanksgiving and Christmas.

I dearly miss her, still.

Thank you for posting her smiling face. What a wonderful photo of two young lovebirds! It warms my heart to know they found their soulmates.

Love to you and the family, and thank you again for keeping this connection alive.


One Woman's Thoughts said...

How wonderful of you to share your parents story of love and life. Thank you so very much. Your Dad was doing just what he was supposed to do on that day. I have no doubt that your mother visited him in his dreams on the couch. I enjoyed reading your Mother's stories again too. Miss that part of her alot.

I have a delightful neighbor in her late 80's and every July she dresses up and celebrates her wedding anniversary. Her husband is long gone (sadly I never had the chance to meet him), but she says the memories are still as beautiful and vivid as ever. She misses him and is grateful that they shared so many years together.
Afterall, love is forever.

deb said...

this photo,
their love,
the posts,
your honest heart.

thank you, seriously.
you honour well.

one little acorn said...

These are the days when the heart aches a little more and the tears flow closer to the surface (or at least they have been for me).
Having said that, they are still special days, and I agree, it's nice to acknowledge them and celebrate the beautiful love you all shared.
Love the pic too.
Thinking of you all. Lots of love.

Meghann LittleStudio said...

What a wonderful family you have. You are all so connected (even when you don't realize it), it is so amazing to see. You are a wonderful daughter, don't feel bad about anything, everyone is grieving and has to find what works for them. You are wonderful to call your dad. I know your mom would be very happy and proud of you for being there for your family :)

Yoli said...

Oh sweetheart you and your family are in our hearts.

Shawn said...

Angelique,I want to thank you for keeping this blog ongoing:) I wish that i would have found this blog when your Mom was still here and with you,But I am so happy that I did find it(I really think your mom led me too it:) I like you lost my best friend my mom of Cancer in April 09 she was 68 ... I am a little older than you! But when i started reading this blog where you were blogging I was crying with you. I too am having such a time with this and cant seem to move forward.But anyway I stayed and started reading Renee's and I was laughing and crying (I had Cancer at 30 and went thru the chemo and Rad and when reading your mom's posts it was me to a tee !! Ohhhhhh the dreaded check ups , Renee wrote it so good :) I feel in my heart we would have been best friends....I could see us both saying fuck cancer ! But I will not take any more of your time.But to say thank you.This has lifted my spirits and I have now started a blog .....just trying to figure out what direction to goooo:) And i am so sorry you lost your mom and best friend...happy ann Renee !

lakeviewer said...

Dear Angelique, your Mom is watching over your Dad, and sends her blessings to all of you. Live and Love and breathe the moment, she would have said. We all learned to appreciate life through her pain.

Blessings to you and yours.

lakeviewer said...

p.s. I didn't realize you kept the blog open. Glad to see and read about you and the family. Happy Birthday to Angelique.

Baino said...

Aww Angelique. It's just a date. It's the time they spent together that's important.

Pattee said...

Angelique... I'm sure your dad will forgive you ~ he loves you unconditionally. Your mom is looking down saying "Good Wahid, I'm glad your resting"

What a beautiful photo of your parents... they are so young.

I look at your mom's card she sent me everyday so I can be reminded of her love...

Thank you for posting ~ I look forward to anything you would like to say... Give your aunt Jacqui a hug for me : )

Ces said...

It seems the start of healing Angelique. Probably your Mom's way of telling you, to pay attention to yourself and to take care for a while. I remember her as one who always reminded me to take care, rest and be good to oneself.

She would not want you to be sad Angelique, although I could just see her grinning and saying "Darn right, Ces! Don't you forget about me." I won't There are days when I long for your mother, I can only imagine how it must be for you. Take care Angelique. Tsup! Tsup!!!

The Strawberry Mallard said...

Angelique you are all that Renee could have hoped for in a daughter and more....your Dad will tell you that, no doubt...and your Mom will continue to be in your heart to all of you!
Nancy & family

Bella Sinclair said...

Oh, Angelique. Aren't they quite the attractive couple, your mother and father. So very young and beautiful and in love. I read over your mother's anniversary posts, taking my time and savoring each word. I smiled to hear her laugh. She wrote as if she were talking to you from across the kitchen table, two coffee cups and perhaps some cookies on a plate, talking as if you are the only person who matters at the moment.

Happy Anniversary to your wonderful parents. I spent my anniversary, not sad, but reflective and grateful and reminiscent of the good times. I hope your father did, too.

Robyn said...

Dear Angelique,
Today is the first day I have popped in for some time to find that your dear Mum has passed on.
Please accept my deepest sympathies to you and your family.
Your Mum was a very special lady and she will be remembered very fondly.
Blessings to you all.

We met here...

Nancy said...

Dear Angelique:

I was going through my junk, getting ready (finally) to move down to Florida to be near my Dad, when I found a Christmas card your mother sent me last year. Not junk, but a treasure.

And, it brought tears to my eyes! Tears of sadness knowing that your mother is no longer with us, or you. Tears of sadness that I never had the opportunity to meet her in person, or to talk to her on the phone. Something I always wanted to do, but.....

And, most of all, tears of sadness that I didn't take your mother's illness seriously. In the rose colored glasses I wear when I don't want to deal with the harsh reality of life, I always told her, and believed, that she would survive the cancer. And, towards the end, I didn't keep in touch with her as much because of the problems in my own life.

I'm sorry if my note is such a heavy one, but it's what I feel in my heart!!

I'm so glad I decided to come here, because I see before me such a beautiful woman!!

It's wonderful that you continue to share your stories on this blog, your mother's legacy to the people she loved with all her heart.

Nancy (EPTAS)

Purpur said...

Looking at your young and beautiful parents, I see myself so long ago. We were full of expectations and hope. Somehow, it fades with years, of course you have many other wonderful things to be thankful for, but this young hope is something else. I think of your dear mother quite often.

flossy-p said...

A truly truly gorgeous photo!