Wednesday, 14 January 2009
Wednesday's Women No. 13
All this talk of money on every TV channel. What money? I never had any and I’m doing alright. People blaming G.W. saying the economy is going to hell in a hand basket. God provides, don’t fear God provides.
And that is total (excuse my language) bullshit when they say people are not buying houses because there are so many new people buying in my development. If there was no money than why are so many people buying?
When I was a young girl and I could be anything I want because I live in the land of opportunity, instead of being a doctor or something like that my Daddy gave me some great advice. ‘Candy, girl, womens will always need to look purddy if they don’t want to lose their man.’ So I took my exstatics course (I only took three weeks though so I don't have my papers but really I learnt all I needed to know) and we were taught to do nails and hair and make-up and all that.
It makes me so mad when I hear all this here talk about blaming G.W. He was the best president this country ever had. And if his Missus ever wants her hair done by me (I think she would look real glamourous as a platinum blond), well that would just be a privilege. A real privilege (my old man put one of those little hair washing sinks by where we does the dishes).
Speaking of my old man; we was discussing how the TV people try to control peoples minds, like by saying smoking ain’t good for you. If I didn’t smoke I would be so stressed out. Don’t believe all that you hear, take me for example, I still have my girlish figure (with a little help from my exstatics dollars to raise my girls [if you get who I mean by girls]) and it ain’t caused me to have one wrinkle yet (the ones on my forehead are from my kids).
I’ll pass on a beauty secret to you all, cause after all we're neighbours now. You can dye your own eyebrows and it is as easy as pie. When I do dark hair on a person I just stick a little brush in the dye and presto new eyebrows. Also a real beauty secret, secret to get lips like mine and Angelina’s (Brad Pitts’ girl) just suck on those hot cinnamon heart candies and place them on your lips. This will burn your lips and make them swell.
Welcome to the neighbourhood…