Wednesday, 22 July 2009
Times Three No. 2
Proof that only bad things happen to good people.
Nathan ‘Mom, Auntie Jacquie called and wants to know if we want to go see her and Sheldon, so we need to go right away.’
We go, Nathan shaves Sheldon’s head and we take pictures and laugh our heads off. They hang out in the pool. Jacquie and I whisper our fears and then quickly remind each other of hope and what the results better be.
Two a.m. and Nathan says ‘Mom, you have to get up, Auntie Jacquie called and we have to rush back to the hospital the ambulance is at her house.’
I fly out of bed and brush my teeth and comb my hair and shove on the clothes that are lying on the floor.
Nathan turns to Jacquie’s house and I ask “Where are you going, we have to go to the hospital?” ‘Auntie Jacquie said to stop at her house first.’
Ambulance and fire truck are outside. We park on the street and I run in the rain while lightning is flashing.
I run in the house and I see Sheldon standing in the hall. I am completely disoriented by this “Sheldon what are you doing standing?” ‘It’s not for me Auntie Renee.” I see his Dad standing around the corner. I look in the bedroom and Jacquie is being put on the stretcher.
Jacquie is clear and wise and calm and brave and telling them what is wrong.
I go tell Nathan to come in the house and that he will stay with Sheldon but if Sheldon looks dizzy or feels faint to call 911. Gilbert and I drive to the hospital.
Jacquie can not move her left side of her body. They have been doing the tests, she had a CT scan earlier in June and the neurologist said that it wasn’t her brain. They think she is not getting enough oxygen to the spine. MIR will need to be done.
At 6:30 a.m. I call Mickey to come and stay with Jacquie because I am dead tired and need to go home and sleep. Wahid picks me up, and I sleep for two hours.
I have to be back at the hospital because I have my own cancer appointment and will be there for two hours getting pamidronite.
I get my treatment and then go see Jacquie. Jacquie is numb on her whole side and can’t move. We wait.
I go see my Mom who is still quarantined. They have lost her swab to test for H1N1 so she needs a new one and will have to stay in quarantine for ten more days.
I go to Angelique’s for lunch and phone to set up the appointments for Sheldon with surgery and oncology.
I am back down with Jacquie, I am very worried. The doctor comes in and tells her oldest son and I that they are transferring her to Health Sciences.
The CT scan that was clean was not so clean after all. The MIR shows a brain tumor over four centimeters. Jacquie is calm. Jacquie is cool as a cucumber. Jacquie doesn’t care because she is thinking of her young son.
They are transferring Jacquie by ambulance and I am to go with her. I climb in the ambulance and sit beside Jacquie. We talk; she just wants to make sure Sheldon is okay. I tell her he will be. I tell her he is my son once removed and I will make him my priority until she is back on her feet.
Nothing is real. I am in the twilight zone.
We get out of the ambulance and I trot behind the men pushing Jacquie. We wait, we get taken to another room, and they do an EKG. Her heart is good. Because her left side is numb she is slumping. The nurse moves her over and Jacquie felt she was going to fall off the bed. Jacquie says ‘Be careful, you almost pushed me off the fucking bed.’ The nurse looks offended. I tell Jacquie she only feels that way, but there is lots of room.
Jacquie’s left side is numb and the bed she is on is broken. We get left alone for ten minutes and Jacquie is slumping on the bed. I am holding her with both arms and pushing her so she doesn’t fall. She is saying that she is in pain and can’t take anymore. I am laughing my head off. She starts laughing her head off. We are both so god damn tired, and so she continues and keeps making me laugh. I have a sore stomach because she is making me laugh. ‘Honest to God Renee, I am about to snap!’
The doctor sees us and tells us the top surgeon will see her in the morning. They will have to do a biopsy of the tumor. They will cut her head and take out the bone, take out a piece of the tumor and put the bone back on.
It is 12:30 a.m. I get home and go to bed.
I get picked up for the hospital at 6:30 a.m. so that Jacquie’s husband and I can get to the appointment to see the top surgeon.
He comes to talk to Jacquie at 7:10 a.m.
Not good news. They think it is cancer. The biopsy will tell us. The doctor asks Jacquie if she has any questions. She has some, but sounds as calm as if she was asking what kind of mustard he was going to put on her sandwich.
Jacquie is calm and brave and in shut-down mode.
(I was just thinking is it only Tuesday, but its not it is now Wednesday at 12:33 a.m.)
I stay till 4 p.m. but I must go home and have a sleep. I hate that my darling sister has this. I don’t think I can stand anymore.
Is this a cosmic joke? Are we the laughingstock of the universe? Do you want me to say “Uncle?”
I fall asleep at 6 p.m. and wake up at 8 p.m. Ben has called me and Sheldon has been rushed back to St. Boniface. Colette and I go to the hospital.
His blood is back down to 69 but when the surgeon came in; he said they don’t think it is internal bleeding again. They give him another blood transfusion.
Joey is going to sleep the night at the hospital with Sheldon; I tell him I need to go to bed but will be up first thing in the morning.
“I love you Sheldon.” ‘I love you too Auntie Renee.’
My Mom is lying in a hospital bed thinking of her daughter and grandson. Please send all your prayers and positive energy to my dear Mom.
Sheldon should have his results in a week. Please send all your prayers and positive energy to our dear boy.
Jacquie will have her surgery on Thursday. Please send all your prayers and positive energy to my dear sister.
I love you Mom.
I love you Sheldon.
Oh my God Jacquie, how I love you.